Pink Overload? NO SUCH THING!

It seems that after my last post (with the pictures of Madelyn during her first snow) I began getting comments about how the pictures were overloaded with pink. Even though one of the people making the comment was none other than Madelyn's own daddy... I have to totally disagree, people! There is simply no such thing as pink overload. I am here to say, "bit your tongues, all you pink-haters!" I think my baby girl looks adorable decked out in her pink dress in her pink BundleMe in her pink stroller with her cute pink hat!!!!! :-)


...okay, so perhaps I'm fighting a losing battle... but maybe Vicky and Ben will back me up??

First Snow!

Today John had to work and April is still out of town, so Madelyn had to come with me to work. Luckily, today was a teacher work day, which means we didn't have students. Teachers are supposed to use today and tomorrow to complete first semester grades and plan for the beginning of second semester. The weather man was calling for snow, but in MD that usually ends up meaning that it'll be really cold - no snow. When I bundled Madelyn up this morning and arrived to school at 7ish, it was just flurries. By the time we left my school around 10:30, it was real snow. Her first real snow! I took a few pictures.

Here is her adorable pink stroller in the snow... you can barely see her little head because she is so bundled up in her BundleMe fleece pouc:
Since you can't really see her little face in the picture above, I did a close-up shot before I got her into the warm car:

This video isn't very exciting because she is just sleeping in her swing... but she's so darn cute! I don't post many videos, so I thought I'd put this one up:

The truth

Okay, so it's not like I thought being a full-time teacher, wife, and mom would be easy. I figured it would have some serious challenges... but truthfully... this is so much harder than I ever could have imagined! I absolutely never even considered the idea of being a stay at home mom. It's no big surprise to anyone that I really love my job. I don't just mean that I love it because it provides us with stable paychecks (well, it will again once my unpaid maternity leave is done) or because it gives me something to do during the day - I truly love teaching. I love my students, I love my classroom, I love making cool lesson plans, I love helping kids kind of understand Shakespeare, I love having former students stop by or write me e-mails just to say hi... I freakin' LOVE being a teacher!

But you know what I don't love??

I don't love leaving Madelyn during the day - even though she is either at home with her daddy or with Aunt April at her house. Actually, I pretty much HATE that. I truly hate that after not getting to bed until midnight (thanks to grading and planning and helping John with Madelyn), waking up at 4:30am to feed Madelyn then get ready for work, and then being at school from 6am-3pm, I am far too grumpy and impatient with my baby girl. It isn't her fault when I have to deal with annoying parents and/or co-workers and/or the occasional ridiculous student all day long... it isn't her fault that I chose to be a working mom... I hate that I've been too exhausted lately to simply enjoy the company of my baby and husband. When I'm not feeding Madelyn, doing laundry, washing dishes, grading papers, making PowerPoints, creating lessons, or responding to parent e-mails, I fall asleep. Sometimes I get a chance to shower and eat, but not as frequently as I wish I did.

I hate that I'm not the mommy that gets to spend all day with her daughter, watching her grow up and not missing a second of it. I hate that I'm not the wife I got to be in California - I don't get up early just to cook bacon and eggs for John (neither of which I'd eat), I don't have time to clean the apartment or iron his work clothes, I rarely put effort into making good dinners, and I can't even tell you the last time we just cuddled up on the couch to watch a movie together. I also hate that I am no longer the type of teacher who does everything - I don't stay after school until 5 coming up with the best ways to improve lessons, I don't help judge the dance company auditions or school play auditions any more, I am not the one who is able to volunteer to help out with anything.

I have three jobs right now, and I feel like I'm seriously sucking at all of them.

So there it is. The truth.

Trip To The Mall

I don't know why my background feels the need to advertise directly on top of my words, but from now on I'll try to remember to leave plenty of space before I start typing.

Today I took Madelyn to the mall, where we met up with April, Ben, Ryder, and Zak. Madelyn typically likes the mall, although she can sometimes scream the entire time. Luckily, today she was content and sleepy. I wanted to remember to take a picture of her with her BundleMe in the stroller because she is so cute when it is zipped up around her and she is all bundled up... but I always forget! I did take a few pictures today though. She had on a cute dress from Grandma Lynn that I took pictures of her in:

This cracks me up because when she is asleep in her swing, sometimes she'll hold her arms out in zombie-fashion:

She got a bath last night and wore the bathrobe that Aunt Debbie gave her for Christmas:

On Christmas Eve I spent some time with one of my friends from high school. I hadn't seen my Jamiejamie in a little over two years! During our walk, we talked a lot about Madelyn and he told me I should have her hold a sign that says "I love Jamie" and take a picture... I did better than a sign:

Stroller Walk

I decided this morning that I wanted to get out of the house for a while. April wanted to borrow some DS games and I wanted to get some yummy bagels to toast in John's new toaster oven. So I got Madelyn all dressed, packed up the diaper bag, and set off (it took a little longer than I expected) Thankfully, I love driving and Madelyn loves riding in the car! We drove to SP to drop off games to April, then went to Einsteins. Afterward, we stopped by to spend some time with Meredith because she hadn't gotten a chance to meet Madelyn yet. Madelyn is already 8 weeks old (on Monday)!! Can you believe it?? After our little venture to SP, we decided to stop at the Harbor Center and walk around a little because it is such a nice day. Our Pediatrician said to avoid malls and crowded indoor areas because of flu/cold season, but being outside was fine. She has her BundleMe in the stroller, so we were good to go. Madelyn enjoys being pushed around outside in her stroller even more than riding in the car... the only problem is that she does NOT enjoy stopping! Whenever I would pause to look inside of a store, she'd scream. People would look at me like I had just pinched her or something... so I'd quickly start moving again. When we were ready to go, it took me far too long to get back into the car. There was a car waiting for my parking space almost as soon as I approached our car, so he had to sit and wait until I got Madelyn secure in her car seat, put the diaper bag in the car, folded up the stroller, got the stroller into the trunk, then got myself situated in the front... hopefully I'll get faster as I get used to doing it.

Sorry, no pictures yet today! For John's birthday, I got him (us) a membership to Sam's Club because we can save lots of money, especially on baby supplies like formula and diapers... We haven't gone to Sam's yet to get our membership cards and John said we might do that this evening when he gets off work, if it doesn't look too crowded. If we do, I'll try to take some pictures there.